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Friday, 20 October 2017
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Avenue Q - Lyrics


If You Were Gay - Album




If You Were Gay


 
(ROD):

Aah, an afternoon alone with my favorite book

Broadway Musicals Of The 1940's

No roommate to bother me

How could it get any better than this



(NICKY):

Oh, hi Rod



(ROD):

Hi Nicky



(NICKY):

Hey Rod, you'll never guess

What happened to me on the subway this morning

This guy was smiling at me and talking to me



(ROD):

That's very interesting



(NICKY):

He was being real friendly

And I think he was coming on to me

I think he might've thought I was gay



(ROD):

Ahem, so why are you telling me this

Why should I care, I don't care

What did you have for lunch today



(NICKY):

Oh, you don't have to get

All defensive about it Rod



(ROD):

I'm NOT getting defensive

What do I care about some

Gay guy you met, okay

I'm trying to read



(NICKY):

Oh, I didn't mean anything by it Rod, I just think

It's something we should be able to talk about



(ROD):

I don't want to talk about it

Nicky, this conversation is over



(NICKY):

Yeah, but



(ROD):

OVER!!!



(NICKY):

Well okay, but just so you know

IF YOU WERE GAY

THAT'D BE OKAY

I MEAN 'CAUSE, HEY

I'D LIKE YOU ANYWAY

BECAUSE YOU SEE

IF IT WERE ME

I WOULD FEEL FREE

TO SAY THAT I WAS GAY

(BUT I'M NOT GAY)



(ROD):

Nicky please

I am trying to read

What?!



(NICKY):

IF YOU WERE QUEER



(ROD):

Ah, Nicky



(NICKY):

I'D STILL BE HERE



(ROD):

Nicky, I'm trying to read this book



(NICKY):

YEAR AFTER YEAR



(ROD):

Nicky



(NICKY):

BECAUSE YOU'RE DEAR TO ME



(ROD):

Argh!



(NICKY):

AND I KNOW THAT YOU



(ROD):

What?



(NICKY):

WOULD ACCEPT ME TOO



(ROD):

I would?



(NICKY):

IF I TOLD YOU TODAY

HEY, GUESS WHAT

I'M GAY

(BUT I'M NOT GAY)

I'M HAPPY

JUST BEING WITH YOU



(ROD):

High Button Shoes, Pal Joey...



(NICKY):

SO WHAT SHOULD IT

MATTER TO ME

WHAT YOU DO IN BED

WITH GUYS



(ROD):

Nicky, that is wrong



(NICKY):

No it's not

IF YOU WERE GAY

I'D SHOUT HOORAY!



(ROD):

I am not listening



(NICKY):

AND HERE I'D STAY



(ROD):

La la la la la



(NICKY):

BUT I WOULDN'T GET IN YOUR WAY



(ROD):

Aaaah!



(NICKY):

YOU CAN COUNT ON ME

TO ALWAYS BE

BESIDE YOU EVERY DAY

TO TELL YOU IT'S OKAY

YOU WERE JUST BORN THAT WAY

AND AS THEY SAY

IT'S IN YOUR DNA

YOU'RE GAY



(ROD):

BUT I'M NOT GAY



(NICKY):

If you were gay



(ROD):

Argh!





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